Balderdash Thoughts

Life lessons…. Optimistic again

I had an amazing breakfast today. And I was happy. Why? Because I chose to be happy. The winds of the night had cleared my mind, as I hit upon this wonderful motto

If I don’t matter, nobody matters to me either.

It’s just like saying “If I’m dead, no one is alive either” “If I won’t eat, everybody else is full too” Except its gonna get crappier and crappier . Haha

I mean, why do I have to breakaway? It is not like my life is over with a bunch of back stabbers. If Lord permits, I might join a professional college within few months. I am bound to make new friends. Better ones.  Who knows someone worthy may even find me :P Well nay pretend you never read that. I can’t just look back again and again and again. Neither should thou!

So all I am dying to say is that I can feel a positive drift of energy in me, driving me sane. I have two great great friends. Anne and Stance. Both give me hope. Both give me a nice company. My neighbour makes me laugh. Stephanie at college makes me fly in joy because nothing pleases me more than a naughty prank. Aw God I am such a kid..

But why Stance? You people barely talk! Nay, He doesn’t fake and is literally NOT falsely cheery. He’s my silent friend and I do hope the friendship remains there :) I value it. Consider it. I hope he doesn’t take it to his head haha Pure Platonic. I am one person in the world who knows the meaning of platonic.

And Anne? It is strange how long we have been together. Distant yet closer. That’s how things work. It’s great how much she helps me out, judging me by the crap of my moods. That she calls me her best friend. We girls gotta stick together now ey

What about those people who do not have Stance and Anne? Look guys. I’m gonna be straight. I am 109 years old so take me seriously. Leave them. Then. and There. Al-right, I know, You all have tried a lot, doing anything that might bring them back, doing everything to save yourself from pain, trying, praying, fighting, struggling. But even if deep down somewhere they do love like you, what good will it do? Too desperate?


The time you waste thinking about them, get a new part-time job, save yourself some money, pay some professional killer AND BE DONE WITH THEM. Huff

… Solitude was never a choice for me. I was forced by Nature to live alone. Can you believe I found my brother after sixteen years of my birth? And well it was a nice period of my life, the one  I spent with him. Tricky aye. Here I was. Ready to break away from so much. But then I said… If I don’t matter… neither does anyone else! (Repetition, pardon)

Everybody goes through the moping period. I’ve had mine. Why leave your true self for someone who so knowingly crushed it? Maybe I myself will retire to my newly resurrected grumpiness within few hours. But then LOOK! I have two great friends! Not anyone gets to witness so much! And there are people even better than me… moping for people even worse than the ones I did for. Don’t give a damn guys (get a new job)

Even though Stance and Anne will part someday, sooner, maybe, than in the periphery of my imagination… But these memories won’t hurt. They were slow. They were sweet. Never overdone. Worth sticking to. I met Anne, I met Stance. And people out there have so much around them they neglect, until they lose something so vital to an illusion. So, before it’s too late guys buy new glasses… I might sound overly cheery… But I know how much it stings. It will sting. But it’s of lot less worth once you decide it doesn’t matter…

Life’s not too short,
I care to keep
The unhappy days
I chose to sleep

3 thoughts on “Life lessons…. Optimistic again”

  1. This one is officially my favorite! That’s so true, Happiness and otherwise is all but what we choose to be. It’s all in one’s mind, and I’m looking up what platonic means moment I’m done posting this :p Haha, anyways, awesome piece :)

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