Balderdash Thoughts

I am an Hsp (yeah, google it)

Hypocrite

I am sitting in front of my cooler in my tiny room, I have the same heart I’ve had, the same feelings, the same attitude. No matter how much I try to change, at the end of the day it’s all the same. Except the intensity has changed. Dislike, hate, go away. Love, test, a hundred chances, over.

Everything is damn fast, man. We don’t wait or absorb a single thing. The moment I start talking about something everyone comes up with their story and I shut up half way through. It’s not always the secrets and the feelings one shares. You start talking about a dream you had last night and before you get to the end people around you have told fifty thousand of their own, so I just shut up and be the person I am good at being. Listen and nod and make a few comments. Yeah I give good advice by the way.. I know friendship is not a game, it’s not a you say I listen I listen you say tv show. But it’s not a joke either..

It’s the same with picking at each other, say one thing and the other returns the favour by adding a jillion spices of their own. Not caring we are friends not foes.. oh I gotta say what I gotta say. 

It’s the same, like watching a friend treat you so low. Like one in the crowd. Hell I treat strangers better. But that sting you feel when the things your friend shares with you are not the special things anymore. It’s already on the media. God, When did I get so stupid..

But it’s okay. Life is crazy. I like my problems. I even like the people who created them. But there is one little thing I let afloat tonight.. If you can’t hold on to me.. if you can’t be there for me.. if you can’t take it all the way.. don’t call me your best friend..don’t even try to be my friend..and stay the heck away from me..

Just stay the heck away from me..

Hypocrisy

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