It’s a small quiet room it’s a small quiet place. I feel good. And deep. I came back in here after a long tour across the whole building. Said hello hi to all my mates. Cracked some jokes talked some more and back to the old shack we come..
What shall I do now.. read a book? Study? Sketch? Write? Or just lie down and sleep early tonight. I met such a nice humble person today and it feels so nice. I am attracted and pulled towards people with stable energies like you wouldn’t believe. I can’t make friends and be at peace with them if the energies don’t match.. Okay.. I am rambling..
So sitting in the auditorium with tens of people walking around, all hopped up on the coming week filled with fun at college. We get only one week and it is a blast every year. Every one is doing something.. painting.. acting.. singing.. playing basketballbaseballvolleyballtennisbadmintonnetballchessdarts.. And all the literary stuff is also going on. Someone is writing poems someone is jotting down essays.. even the Urdu people are going on with the fun you wouldn’t believe.. but I am better suited with the good old English ey. And I am nothing like the jumpy thing I was at school poking my nose in everything I can lay my hands on (lol) Anyways this place just is everything except a medical college right now.. And the energy is contagious!
Anyways. I better read a book now aye, my roomie is nowhere to be seen
Dracula, here I come =P
There is a lot I want to write. And it is not everyday I get such a surge. I watched Kiki’s delivery service. The huge studio Ghibli and anime fan I am… But sometimes these thoughts kick in and engulf me entirely. I feel as if the vibrations have found, finally found a openeing in me to enter. As if somewhere, in my mind, something has finally clicked. The pieces of the jigsaw getting together. Finally. I can feel the energy pushing its way through my veins outrunning blood. It has been a long time this has happened. It has been a long time I felt myself. The person I understand. The one, undivided, complete persona. Yes this is me
Yes, this is me. swimming in the sea of pain and sadness. Flying with the wild geese. This is me. Silent. So quiet. Letting the colours find me. Letting the wind talk. Hearing her truly today. This is me. Born alone. The person who is destined to remain so. And I am making decisions. This is the right time. I have the right energy.
I will find what I am destined to. I will find my own inspiration. I should say I am lost, I think I am losing it. BUT HELL NO. NO!! I am on my way to find it. I will find it! They say destiny and miracles reach you when they have to. Yes. Yes I am a believer. But things depend on how we accept things! How our eyes view and our minds interpret. God my hand never flew so smoothly across this keyboard. It has been months. Months. Months..
What talent do I yet have? Apart from the stuff I *think* I do, I can write. And what am I trying to do all this time? Master as many forms of prose and poetry as I can. Am I serious about it? Was not.. until now!
So what if I am plunging into a life that is gonna throw me as far away from all this as it can. I have lost so much. I might get so much. I dunno. But now I have that feeling. That energy to promise myself that I will not let my dreams die. I will listen to my heart! And bless my brain… It accompanies me in every crazy thing I want to do
And I am going to do stuff so crazier. And even if I might not get it all.. I am not going down.. why? I never ask more. Give me just a little bit. And I will get over it…
(Title: Quote by Einstein)